Hope

Someone sent this to me, and asked if I could relate. http://www.stevewiens.com/?utm_source=The+Actual+Pastor+Email+Subscriptions&utm_campaign=7737bbbf8e-RSS_EMAIL_CAMPAIGN&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_6beb214c33-7737bbbf8e-56355553

This was my response:

What a great read!  I haven't done a full marathon, but I've done a half, training for my second half, but have done dozens of smaller races over the last few years.  My best friend and I do a lot of races together, along with her sister.  I was the runner first, then they started together later.  I had never thought about doing a race.. My friend and I ran her second, my first race together.  I beat her, only by seconds, but I did it.  Since then, I have in my mind that I need to beat her.  She's thinner than I am, well, just smaller in general.  I don't know why I feel like it's a competition  with her (only in my head).  It totally gets to me.  Messes with my head.  I beat her in January, had my best race EVER!  she was injured, so in my head, it didn't count that I beat her.  I "hope" to do better than her, I "hope" to beat her time.  The last race I ran, I was beating her, then I couldn't breathe, bra was too tight, air was too humid.  I was still moving.. decided to walk.. heard her sister from behind, telling me to do it, just to go!  Oh, did I mention that it rained and I soaked my shoes before the race?   All these head games, Satan, telling me I can't.  My legs saying I can, but my head not listening.  Thinking back to my first half marathon, we trained together.. come race day, it snowed in Myrtle Beach.. race CANCELLED.  Months of training, gone.. but there was a race in Columbia 2 weeks later.  I ran it.  UP HILL most of the time (never run this race, it stinks).  She didnt run with me.  So, I had to do it myself.  I found people running about my pace, I'd go ahead, they'd go ahead.  I prayed, just talked to God to let me finish this race.  I finished the race, beat the time I had in my head, surged at the end!!  NO ONE was there.  I was crushed.  Did the biggest race of my life, and no one was at the end.  One of the ladies I met before the race was congratulating me, I started to sob.. All this work and no one was there to see me do it.  I feel like I do this a lot.  God is really the only one I need to be there with me, for me.  

 I guess I went off topic a bit, but the analogy for me is.. during my race, and the end of my race. I can hope to beat someone else, I can hope to beat my previous time, I can hope someone is there to cheer me on at the end.  God is truly the one constant that I seem to forget to turn to.  It's great having someone to cheer you on along the way, to give you that salt pack to boost you along when you feel you can't go any further.   He is there cheering me on the whole way, He is there at the end.  

So, It's late, I am waiting on laundry then off to bed.  It's Easter!  He is risen!  I am heading to church in the morning at 8:15 then teaching 2nd and 3rd graders at 9:45.  I love these kiddos!  I have had a busy few weeks. Well, the girls and I all got the stomach bug and it was not fun.  I lost 11 pounds in 4 days.  :(  Not my idea of weight loss.  I gained 8 of it back because I could actually keep food down.  But, since I started at the body shop, I am down 20 pounds!  I am back to pre-Madison weight and then some.  I still need to tone the tummy and a few other places, but I look good! and feel even better.  I am just excited I can be a role model for my girls.  They get to see me exercise and eat the right foods.  Madison ran her first race a few weeks ago. She was so excited to get that medal and I couldn't have been more proud of her.  Meredith received a medal also.  I'll have to post pics at some point.  Well, I guess it's off to bed. I am feeling a tired, finally, and have to be up early!  Happy Easter!

A little bit of this....

and a little bit of that.  I have really enjoyed these last few weeks with my healthy eating options.  I am enjoying cooking more.  I have even managed to bake a few cakes and not go overboard with the taste testing.  Here are just a few of some things I have made.

3 weeks in -- UNLEASHED!

So, all my life I have had to struggle with my weight.  Not hard to believe since my entire maternal side of the family have always been over weight.  I watched my mom in a constant struggle.  She has been on every diet out there!  I remember her greatest success (when I was younger) was Overeaters Victorious.  It was a faith-based program that included daily prayer.  Seemed to work for her, why isn't it still around?  Or maybe it is, you just don't hear about it.

After Madison was about 6 months old, I got serious about losing the baby weight.  After Meredith, I took my time.  Well, I was tired of clothes not fitting right.  So, I decided to make a change.  I went part time at work then to quitting altogether.  This gave me the opportunity to start working out at The Bodyshop Athletics in Lexington.  It's hard, I mean HARD!  I'm also trying to run 3 days a week.  The Bodyshop offered some help as well.  A 6 week plan to healthier eating and calorie burning!  I'm down 10 pounds!  I'm 12 pounds away from my goal weight!  I can't believe it. I'll be posting pics of before, middle and after.  But I'm not quite ready.  So.. I will eventually post recipes and my new way of looking at food.  Until then...

New adventure

Well, since Wesley is gone and I'm staying home, I have decided to become a Thirty-One gifts consultant.  Why?  It's something I can do to earn a little income.  If it sticks and works, maybe I can do cakes and 31 and not have to go back to work!  That's the plan.  It will give me the time my girls need and deserve!  I can't wait!!!